Priesthood Blessings...

Last week was a rough week to say the least.  I was sick on Sunday (nauseated and diarrhea) and it carried over to Monday.  Luckily, it wasn't as bad the second day.  But me being sick was not what made the week rough. 

On Tuesday, I went running on the walkway behind our house, which of course goes by the park.  Carter kept screaming "weeee, pease, weeee".  He wanted to go on the swings and slides.  After about a mile and a half, I gave up and let him play.  Plus I didn't have a lot of reserve in me from not eating the previous two days so it wasn't feeling to good to run.  Anyway, he played at the park for a little bit and then we went for a little walk/run around our neighborhood.  We went by one of our neighbors' homes and they were out front working in the yard.  We stopped and talked/played for about an hour before we headed home.  Carter felt a bit warm to me, but I thought it was from being out in the sun a little too long. 

That night he felt even warmer and he began to sound raspy.  We took his temperature and it was around 100.2*.  Not very high, but still a fever.  We gave him some medicine and put him to bed.  He woke up a couple of times in the night wanting juice (water).  We would give him a drink and he would go back to sleep. 

The next day, he was still feverish, raspy and now had a cough.  He was also very subdue and if you know him, that is not normal, to say the least.  I spent most of the day snuggling him and trying to get him to eat or drink something.  He was not interested in eating and had very little interest in drinking. 

That night, he was in his highchair and getting the heavy eyes.  We toke him out and asked him if he wanted to go night-night.  He headed for the stairs.  Carter definitely was not feeling good.  We got him ready for bed, gave him medicine and laid him down. 

This is where it gets fun.  He began to wake every 10-20 minutes crying.  He kept saying, "mom mom, help, help, mom mom".  It broke my heart.  I was right there, but he kept saying it.  He was having fever nightmares (his temperature was around 101.6*).  He was thrashing around and was in so much pain.  We had given him medicine, but it didn't seem to be doing its' job.  I had told Bill earlier in the night that he needed to give Carter a blessing.  I think after seeing all of the thrashing around, Bill finally decided the medicine was not doing all it should.

SIDE NOTE:  Even in all his pain, Carter would have a break through and be his funny self.  He would lay his head down and pretend to be snoring.  He would even ask for a book to read and went through it pointing out the animals.

When Bill went to put the annointing oil on Carter's head, he screamed and thrashed around.  After a few tries, Bill was finally able to do it.  He then went to put his hands on Carter's head and Carter kept pushing them away.  It hurt to have the pressure on his head.  Bill was finally able to touch Carter's head after a few minutes of trying and gave the annointing prayer.  Carter then allowed me to hold him on my chest and I was able to get him to calm down.  There was no fight this time and Bill was able to give him a blessing.  Carter was calm and even fell asleep during the prayer.  He actually got 4 straight hours of sleep, the most he had had in a row the last couple of nights.  I know it is because of the blessing Bill gave him.

Carter woke the next morning with no fever.  He was still raspy and coughing, but his fever was gone.  He got a slight one that night, but it was gone for good in the morning.  I am so grateful for Bill and his ability to hold the priesthood.  It has blessed our lives many times and it will continue to bless our lives.  Until next time...

On a Lighter Note...

I was told my last few posts were on the sad/depressing side of things and that I needed to post more uplifting events.  I was going to try and picture update the last 2 years, but I first want to share some things that have occurred in the last week and a half. 

Carter has discovered how to get out of his crib.  We used to have his room set up with a rocking chair and over sized chair on either side of his crib.  Well we found out that he was diving head first into one of the chairs to get out.  Bill was afraid Carter was going to break his neck so we had to rearrange things.  There is no longer a chair near his crib, but somehow Carter was still getting out.  We decided to put him back in and watch what he does to get out.  Here is video of how he escapes now (plus a little extra): 

 I give up!  I have tried to upload this video a million times and it keeps coming back with an error.  I guess I will just have to discribe what he does.  Carter goes to the end of his crib, swings one leg over and then the other leg.  While grasping onto the side railing, he extends his body as far as he can and then releases his hands.  He is getting tall enough that when he extends, his toes are touching the floor.  It is much funnier to watch though.  He is so fluid when he does it.

On top of learning how to get out of his crib, Carter also learned how to open doors.  We figured this out when one morning he came into our room (Bill was already at work) and touched my hand.  I was sound asleep when he did this so it gave me quite a shock.  Needless to say, we now have doorknob covers on a few doors.

So I have always wondered how other people's kids could just fall asleep wherever.  Carter was never one to just conk out in the middle of an activity.  The weirdest location he ever fell asleep was his carseat.  Well that has all changed in the last month or so.  He is progressively getting weirder and weirder.

Again, having issues loading pictures.  I did have another rocking chair picture to load and one of him asleep behind the oversized chair in his room (that was the best one).  Maybe one day this stupid site will let me load them.

The last couple are of him in the rocking chair in his room.  They were taken after we had put him to bed.  I guess his crib is no longer comfortable and he is seeking a restful place elsewhere.  Crazy kid!

Well I hope to be able to sum up the last 2 years in the next post or two.  Until next time...

Stupid computer or blogger.com

So I have a blog post that I want to "publish", but there are a few more things I would like to add to it.  I am trying to add a video and a couple of more pictures, but I keep getting an error message.  UGH!!!!  I will hopefully get it posted soon.

And the saga comes to an end...

Bill was on his way to the hospital and I was on my way back to a waiting room.  Once I was in the waiting room, I was bombarded with people.  I think, at one point, I had 6 people in there all asking me questions.  This was definitely more choatic than the first D&C. 

They got me hooked up to an IV and administered the anesthesia.  I remember being wheeled out of the room and down a hall.  From there I have no idea what happened.  I don't even remember waking up from the surgery.

After everything was done, Bill loaded Carter and I into the car and we were on our way home.  I just wanted to eat (I hadn't had anything since dinner the night before) and sleep.  We were all looking forward to some sleep.

A couple of days later (August 23rd), I had an appointment with my Ob/Gyn.  It took them a little while before they got me back to be seen.  It turns out that the ultrasound tech wasn't sure why I was being seen and was trying to get all of my paperwork together.  She thought I was following up the original D&C, she didn't know I had an emergency one. 

Anyway, after explaining the whole situation to her, I got an ultrasound done to make sure EVERYTHING was gone from my uterus.  And thank goodness, it looked like it was.

After some more waiting, I met with my doctor.  She was very apologetic about the whole situation.  She was positive that she had gotten everything on the first D&C and that she did it on the correct side.  They even reviewed the original ultrasounds to see if they had missed something.  A substitute ultrasound tech had done my original transvaginal ultrasound so they had contacted her to make sure she was positive she had done it correctly.  I guess if you get the "wand" turned upside down then it will flip the image on the screen.  She was sure she had done it correctly. 

Well looking at the ultrasound pictures a little closer, they made a discovery.  She was correct in that the first pregnancy had been in the right side of my uterus.  She had gotten a shot of my left side as well.  In that picture, they saw a dark circle in my uterus, which my doctor said could have been a gestational sac forming.  If this is true, then I was pregnant with twins that were conceived 4 weeks apart!  We are not 100% sure this is what happened.  My doctor stated that it is one of many possibilities, but it is what makes sense to me.  My doctor said that she has had the hospital mess up on previous D&Cs she has done before.  They have sent off the blood to pathology rather than the tissue.  That would explain why the pathology report came back saying there was no "conceptual byproduct".

To make sure I was not pregnant, I had to go in once a week to get my HCG levels tested until they reached zero.  It took three weeks of getting my blood tested before I was no longer considered pregnant.

Such craziness!  We are not sure exactly what happened.  I could have been pregnant with twins conceived 4 weeks apart or it could be an even greater mystery.  I guess we will never know.  I do know this, it has been a very difficult situation for me.  I constantly ask myself why, what, how.  "Why did this happen to me?"  "What did I do wrong?"  "What could I have done differently?"  "How could this happen to me?"  I also wondered where my miracle was in all of this.  I had been told there would be a miracle.  All I found was heartache. 

Today is the eve of my due date and though it has gotten a bit easier, it still hurts.  I have been struggling with the fact that I am still grieving and get choked up about it.  I have constant reminders that I am not having a baby.  There are 2 women in my neighborhood/ward that are due within the next couple of weeks and I have had to watch their bellies grow while mine does not.  I have had to hear of others exciting news while I, myself, have a broken heart.  I do find comfort in the fact that these women do not know my pain and I hope they never will.

I have learned from all of this.  I have always wondered how women who already have children can grieve that they are struggling to have more.  Why couldn't they be happy that they already had kids?  I now understand.  Wanting more children does not mean you love your child/children less, in a way it means you love them more.  I also learned that it is okay that I am still grieving.  We all handle things in our own way and our own time.  I prayed wondering what was wrong with me and how I could get through this.  I received my answer in the Febraury 2013 Ensign (I swear most of those articles were written for me), more specifically the articles called "I Can Decide","The Refining Fire Of Grief" and "Lifting The Hands Which Hang Down".  Reading these articles brought me some peace and made me realize that I was okay to still grieve, but I also needed to move beyond myself.

Now you may be wondering if I ever got my miracle out of this.  In a way, I did.  Or should I say Bill did.  After the first D&C, I went to Boise and Bill went to Idaho Falls.  He was struggling with the loss and decided he wanted to be around family.  Bill's uncle Ellis was in the hospital and had declining health.  Bill was able to go visit him and see him one last time before he passed away a short time later.  Had we not had the miscarriage, Bill would have never gotten that time to spend with his uncle.

My heart aches everyday that I don't get to have my little one, but I know one day I will.  As time passes, it will get easier and more days will pass between each thought.  While I grieve the loss of a little one who I did not know, I cherish the little one that is currently filling my home with love, laughter, and life.  Until next time...

The saga ends...?

Alright, so I left you at being checked into the hospital and being taken back to an exam room.  Once I was in the exam room, the nurse had me change into a hospital gown and get into bed.  She then proceeded to ask me what was going on.  I told her about the bleeding and cramping.  I also had to tell her about any previous surgeries I had had and of course that included the D&C from 5 weeks earlier.  She then asked me what my pain level was at on a scale of 1 to 10.  I told her "11".  I had never felt pain like this before and I have sprained my ankles a number of times and had a c-section.  Then the ER doctor came in and I had to answer the same questions.  He also asked me if I wanted morphine for my pain.  I don't know why, but I froze.  Why would I suddenly, with the pain that I was in, decide to go the no medication route that I usually take?  The nurse saw this hesitation and said, "Her pain is at a 10, she will take morphine".  Her saying that clicked me out of my fog and I said, "yes, I will take the morphine".  Within a couple of minutes, I had some morphine and was feeling much better.

I don't know how long I had to wait, but the ER doctor finally examined me.  WARNING: GRAPHIC INFO!  He took a cotton swab and swiped my womanly region.  He ended up getting a mucus like ball of goo out and sent it to be tested for HCG (pregnancy hormone).  Within a couple of minutes, the nurse was back with a positive test.  I was pregnant!  WHAT?!?!?!  How could I be pregnant?  I had just had a D&C done 5 weeks prior and knew there was no way I could be pregnant again.  The doctor decided that I needed to have an ultrasound done to see if there was any of the baby-like material in my uterus.  I was wheeled to another room where this would take place.

Again, it was a waiting game.  The ultrasound tech had to be called in and he had another patient before me.

Well he finally made his way into my room and oh joy, I got to have a vaginal ultrasound.  Men are so lucky!  That's beside the point.  He was performing the ultrasound and discovered that I had a bicornuate (heart shaped) uterus.  I already knew this, but he was finding out for himself.  He checked one side of my uterus and then the other.  He kinda had a perplexed look on his face the whole time.  He had been told of my circumstances so he knew I had had a D&C.  He asked me which side my pregnancy had been on and I told him the right.  The perplexed look returned to his face.  He said that he found "stuff" (and by stuff I mean, gestational sac, tissue, etc) on the left side of my uterus, but there was nothing on the right.  He said the stuff was consistant with a pregnancy, but there was no heartbeat.  He gave his findings to the ER doctor and I was on my way back to the exam room.

The ER doctor came in and told me that they contacted the on call OB/Gyn to come in and take a look.  I would have to wait though because he was busy delivering babies.  At this point, Bill decided to take Carter home to get some breakfast and some sleep.  I think it was around 8am, but I'm not sure.

Carter and Bill left, while I got to try and get some rest while waiting for the on call OB/Gyn.  Let's just say, it is not easy to get any rest in a hospital, even if you are running on only 2 hours of sleep.

I don't know how long I had to wait, but it seemed like forever before the OB/Gyn got there.  He was actually having to deliver 2 babies before he could come see me.  Anyway, he examined me, had the ultrasound results and the results for my first D&C  He asked me what I thought was going on.  I told him I had no idea.  Instead of telling me, he asked me again what I thought was going on.  After doing this a couple of times, I finally said, either my doctor had screwed up the first D&C or my body was weird.  I was a little irritated with him.  I wanted to yell at him that I had only gotten 2 hours of sleep and I was there because I was not a doctor and so therefore I didn't know what was going on.  He either sensed that I was getting irritated or he was done playing his little game and decided to tell me what he thought.

He said that according to the pathology report from my first D&C, there was no "conceptual byproduct" found.  Meaning there was no tissue, gestational sac, etc.  Nothing that would indicate that I had been pregnant.  All they got was blood.  He said he thought that my doctor had done the D&C on the wrong side of my uterus and that the issues I was having was from my body trying to naturally pass it on its own.  He thought that since it had been as long as it had (5 weeks) since the first D&C and my body hadn't passed the baby naturally, we should do another D&C.  He also said due to the amount of bleeding that was occurring, I was more than likely hemorrhaging.  At this point, I just wanted everything to be done and taken care of.  I told him to go ahead and do the D&C.  I called Bill to let him know what was going on and that I would be going in for surgery shortly.  He said to call him before they take me back so he knew when to leave to come get me.

It was probably no more than 20 minutes before I was calling Bill back to tell him to head over to the hospital.  I was on my way back to the OR.

Again, another long post that will have to be finished another day, another time.  Until next time...

The saga continues...

Okay so I left off at being scheduled to go to the hospital and having a D&C.  As I said before, I was lucky my niece and nephew were there to visit.  They helped take care of Carter while Bill and I went to the hospital.  I was scheduled to have the surgery at 6pm so I had to show up at 4pm for paperwork and prep.  Instead of being a 2 hour wait, it turned into almost 4 hours.  It turns out that the OR was backed up, they had a patient not go as planned.

Anyway, it was finally my turn.  I was wheeled into the OR and the last thing I remember is looking up at my doctor as she held my hand. 

What felt like a blink of an eye later, I woke up in the recovery room.  You could say I was a bit dazed and confused.  That didn't last long though.  The memory of why I was there came rushing back.

Shortly after I woke up, they wheeled me into another waiting room where Bill was able to come in and see me.  I don't remember much of what happened.  I do remember they said they had to remove a suspicious looking mole, one that I did not know I had.  They also said that everything went well and that I would need to follow up with my doctor in a couple of weeks.

The day after the procedure I was off to Boise to take my niece and nephew home and to get a little rest. 

During the day I was usually okay, but at night I was a mess.  I had a hard time comprehending how and why this happened.  I had been told the baby was whole and healthy and there would be a miracle in all of this.  Where was my miracle?

Anyway, time went by and things started to get back to "normal".  About five weeks after my D&C, I started having some bleeding and cramping.  I thought it was my period starting because it fit within the time frame that they had given me.  That night, August 20, I went to bed about 10pm.  Around 1am, I woke up in excruciating pain.  It felt like the worst cramps I had ever had.  I got up and went to the bathroom.  WARNING: GRAPHIC INFO!  In 3 hours I had bled through a tampon.  Not normal, but not abnormal for me either.  I changed my tampon, put on a pad and took a percocet (again, worst cramps I had ever felt).  I went back to bed and tried to fall asleep.

No such luck.  I kept tossing and turning in bed, but the pain would not go away.  Finally, after about 2 hours, I got up and went into the bathroom.  Again I had bled through my tampon AND the pad.  The percocet had done nothing for me, I was still in a lot of pain.  I took an ibuprofen and a hot bath.  Neither did anything for me.  I was reeling in pain and every time I put pressure on my abdomen, blood would gush out.  By this time, Bill was awake and very concerned.  I was extremely fidgety and uncomfortable.

About 3:45am, I called my mom and told her what was going on.  She said it sounded like I was in labor.  I said there was no way because I was not pregnant.  She suggested trying the hot bath, taking something, curling into the fetal position.  All things I had already tried and did not work.  Bill at this point suggested we go to the ER.  I said "no".  I did not want to be one of those people who went for a stupid reason, plus I was thinking about the cost of an ER visit.

Finally, around 4am, I decided I had to go to the ER.  The pain was getting worse and I was not finding comfort from anything I was doing.  Bill got dressed, grabbed Carter and I called my mom to let her know.

We arrived at the hospital (a different one than the original) a little before 4:30 am.  Got checked in and taken right back.

Again this post is getting long so I will finish the story in another post at another time.  Until next time...

It has been so long...

With much nudging from mom, I have decided I need to TRY and blog again.  I never knew that a child could take up as much time as they do.

Anyway, it has almost been two years since I last wrote on this blog and it took me about 30 minutes to figure out how to sign in.  A lot has happened in the last two years and I am not going to be able to cover it all, but I will try and document some of it.

I want to start by talking about the HARDEST thing I have ever had to go through in my life.  I have never had anything affect me quite like this experience has. 

About eight months ago (June 27, 2012), I was overjoyed to find out that I was pregnant.  It was not planned, but I was ecstatic!  I couldn't stop smiling and I couldn't wait for Bill to get home so I could share the news with him.  As the day dragged on, I got more and more excited.  Bill finally got home and I just about blurted it out.  Instead, I composed myself and asked him a simple math question.  "When does 1+1=4?"  He looked at me bewildered and I said, "when Carter is going to be a big brother".  He still didn't get it and I had to show him the pregnancy test.  He was still a little confused, but things finally clicked.  As I said, it was not planned so his thinking was nowhere in the pregnancy atmosphere.  Once it sank in, he was as happy as I was, or at least he said so.

Well the happiness would soon come crashing down.  A week and a half later, our world would begin to change forever.  It was a Saturday and I laid down to take a nap while Bill went car shopping.  I'm not sure how long it had been, but Bill arrived at the house with a car to test drive.  I was feeling fine, but by the time I reached the car I felt a gush of warmth.  I felt my capris and when I looked at my hand, it was saturated in blood.  I started to panic!  I didn't know what to do, I had never gone through this before.  We hadn't told anybody I was pregnant so I didn't know who to call.  I finally called the on-call doctor from my Ob/Gyn's office and explained to him what was going on.  He said it was likely a miscarriage, but they wouldn't know for sure until I got checked out.  He said to call the office on Monday and get an ultrasound appointment.  I then called my mom and broke the news to her.  Not exactly the way I wanted her to find out.  She didn't know what I was experiencing, but I needed to cry to somebody (sorry Bill, but men don't really understand).

That night, after a lot of crying, I finally asked Bill for a blessing.  I knew I needed to find comfort somewhere and what better person, but my Heavenly Father.  I was told in the blessing that everything would be fine and that the baby was whole and healthy.  I was also told that there would be a miracle in all of this.  Hearing the words of the blessing brought me some peace.  As Bill and I went to bed that night, I began to cry.  I told him that I knew the baby was whole and healthy, but we don't know if that was to be here on Earth or in Heaven.  I had a feeling that something was not right.  I couldn't explain it, but I just knew.

Come Monday, I made an appointment for an ultrasound for the next day.  I still had bleeding, but not to the extent that had occured on Saturday.  Tuesday, I went in and had an ultrasound done.  They were able to find the baby and a heartbeat.  The heartbeat was 101, which is low since it is usually 120-180.  The tech said not to worry that sometimes it can be lower this early in the pregnancy.  She "examined" my entire uterus, but was not able to determine the source of the bleeding.  She also gave me an ultrasound picture of the baby.  Here it is (the little white dot in the big black spot):

It is not much, but it was my baby.  At the end of the appointment, I was scheduled for another ultrasound for the following week.

I went throughout the week as normal as can be, but was still spotting and still worried.  Over the weekend, I picked up my niece and nephew to have them come visit.  It was nice having them because it took my mind off of things.

On Wednesday, I went in for my follow up ultrasound.  The ultrasound tech found the baby, did some measuring and then checked for the heartbeat.  This time there wasn't one.  I immediately began to cry.  She then went to get a doctor and he confirmed her findings.  According to her measurements, the baby had died within a day of the last ultrasound.  I then had to wait until my doctor got to the office so we could discuss what to do next.

In the time that I waited, I called Bill and my mom to break the news to them.  Bill left work and came to the doctor's office.  I could tell by the look on his face, he was as devastated as I was about the loss.  My doctor finally got there and we were given three options.  1. Let the baby pass naturally.  2. Use a pill that is supposed to help move things along.  3. Get a D&C (dialation & curettage).  The first two options could result in having to get a D&C so we decided it was our best option.  I was scheduled to go to the hospital that night.

Since this is a long post, I will continue the story in another post on another day.  Till next time...

4 MONTHS OLD!!!!

That's right, Carter is 4 months old now.  He had his 4 month check-up last week and everything looks good.  He was 14.6 lbs, 24.9 inches long and has a head circumference of 16.2 inches.  That amounts to 50% for height and weight, 25% for head circumference.  Carter is a growing boy for sure.  The doctor said we could also start feeding Carter rice cereal.  So far he has really liked it, but you wouldn't guess that with how much ends up on his face.

In another couple of days or so, we get to try VEGGIES!  I'm thinking Carter will really like those. 

It has been so fun to see Carter grow and develop his own little personality.  I just love to kiss his "little" cheeks and watch him discover new things.  What a joy he has been to Bill and I.  Until next time...

3 Months Already

So the Little Man is 3 months old (yesterday) already! He celebrated by sleeping 10 hours straight!!!
Doesn't he just look so comfortable? Unfortunately he has also been battling RSV. Not a very serious case, but it sure is making mommy miserable. It breaks my heart to hear him coughing and trying to breath through a stuffy nose. I just wish there were something I could do about it. In the midst of it all, he is still a happy baby; smiling, cooing, and laughing at mommy's singing. He also allowed me to do a GQutie photoshoot with him. Here are some of those photos: Gotta love this little guy! He is growing so much faster than I ever wanted him too. It is fun to see him start to accomplish little milestones, but why must he reach them so quickly?

It has been so long

I know, I know, it has almost been 6 months to the day of my last post and so much has happened. I will do my best to catch you all up so here we go.

My belly obviously got bigger with time and so did the number on the scale. We continued to have ultrasounds to monitor the baby's grow and my uterus. Things were looking good until my appointment the Monday before Thanksgiving. I had an ultrasound done, before I met with my Ob/Gyn, to measure the amniotic fluid level and the baby's growth. The ultrasound tech really didn't say anything to us, but asked if we had an appt with the Dr. When we said yes, she said that the Dr would discuss the ultrasounds with us. Is it me or is that not very comforting? I was starting to panic a little bit and getting a little anxious. I knew I had a high probability for complications, but things had been going so well. We finally met with my Dr and she told us that I had lost some amniotic fluid, the chord was around his neck once, and he was breech. I was only 35 weeks at the time so she wanted to monitor the baby's health a little closer. I had a nonstress test done that day to make sure his heart was functioning properly and that he was getting enough oxygen. He passed with flying colors, but she still had concerns. That day we scheduled a nonstress test to be done at the hospital on Thanksgiving morning, an ultrasound and nonstress test to be done the following Monday, and a nonstress test to be done a week from Thanksgiving. To top it all off, we scheduled a c-section 2 weeks from that day. It was tentative at the time, but in case I continued to lose amniotic fluid, she wanted the maternity OR to have me on their schedule. Fortunately the baby passed all of his nonstress tests, but I continued to lose amniotic fluid. Which meant the tentative c-section became a definite one.

So on Monday, December 6, 2010, Bill and I arrived at the hospital at 4:30AM. This was a whole new experience for me. I had never had a baby before, let alone major surgery. You could say I was scared out of my mind. I had cried every night for the past 2 weeks worrying about that morning. Now that it had come, I wasn't doing much better. I was so nervous/scared that my body was shaking and my teeth were chattering, but once they began to prep me for surgery, a calm came over me and I was ready to see my baby.

Carter was born at 6:47am, weighing 6lbs 1oz and 17 3/4 inches long.

Here are the following 3 months via pictures:

First Christmas

Daddy Time
Sleeping w/ Grandpa

Cuddling w/ Grandma

Blessing Just chillin

Smiling so big

Baby/belly update

We just had an appointment this last Monday. Surprisingly, the visit was uneventful, except for one thing... I gained 8 lbs in the last month! Now my Dr has not said anything to me about my weight, unless I ask, until that visit. I guess I need to start watching what I eat and not use the "I'm eating for 2" excuse anymore. I have already gained more than half of the weight that I should and have 14 more weeks to go. Wow 14 more weeks! I remember hitting the 14 week mark. I guess this is going by faster than I thought. For those of you who have requested it, I finally got an updated belly shot.

I am 25.5 weeks along in this picture and look huge. I often wonder how my stomach is going to get any bigger. I'm already starting to feel some discomfort, such as trouble breathing and I'm told it is only going to get worse. Oh boy.

Speaking of boys. We had another ultrasound at this last visit. Here are some of the pictures from it:

There is no doubt it is a boy. He is definitely not shy about showing his manhood. Now try and get a picture of his face and it is a whole other story.

It also looks like we may have a little body builder on our hands. Not only was he doing a body builder pose, but it also looks like he already has a bicep muscle forming. His daddy is so proud.

Well everything is going good and according to plan. We just hope things keep going smoothly and that our little man doesn't come too early. As anxious as I am to meet him, I wouldn't mind carrying him around in me for another 3 months or so. Until next time...

So I am a little behind...

We have had some major milestones the last two weeks or so. To begin with, Bill has finally been able to feel the baby move. I have felt him move for the last 5 weeks or so, but not until last week could Bill feel it. Bill had his hand on my stomach and the baby either kicked or punched at his hand. Either the baby does not like Bill to touch me or they are beginning their male bonding. Then this last Sunday, I was laying on my in-law's couch and the baby began moving around like crazy. I looked at my stomach and it was rolling and moving, which was quite the sight to see. This went on for at least 5 minutes or so. He is also getting much stronger with his movements. I am beginning to feel them more frequently and usually when I want to rest.

I also had a doctor's appointment on Monday. All of the measurements from my ultrasound were good, with no visible issues at this time. We also had the baby tested for downs syndrome and that came back negative. So far so good. The baby's heartbeat was strong, but as usual it was not all that easy for the Doctor to get the heartbeat. Every time she put the device on my stomach and got his heartbeat, he would kick at her. She said we are going to have our hands full with this one. With how active he is now, I just wonder what it is going to be like once he is born. In short, everything looks good so far. I am 2 weeks away from my safety zone (the earliest the baby can be born and still have a chance of survival). The closer we get to that point, the more relaxed and confident I get with this pregnancy.

Oh and sorry to those of you who would like to see my belly growth. I ran out of room on my camera's memory card and have not purchased a new one yet. I will hopefully get a picture posted in a couple of weeks or so. Until next time...

IT'S A . . . (read to find out)

I know I haven't been very good about updating the blog, but things have been a little crazy lately. Well the belly is getting bigger every week and I am starting to look more pregnant than fat. Here is a photo of the belly at 16 weeks:

I know I missed the 12 week photo, but as I said things have been crazy.

A week ago I went in to see my doctor and she found the baby's heartbeat right away. Whew!! No stress this visit. The heart was beating strong and baby did not want to stay still. Everytime the Dr found the heartbeat, the baby would move and she would lose it. Those are good signs to me.

Yesterday, I went in for my 18 week ultrasound. This is the ultrasound where they check out the organs, bones, gender, etc. It was still up for debate whether we were going to find out the gender of our baby or not. I wanted to wait and be surprised, but Bill wanted to find out. When the ultrasound tech asked if we were going to find out the sex of the baby, Bill proudly claimed "YES". I had finally given into his "pleading". She began the ultrasound and it was obvious that we have a very active baby on our hands. It kept moving around; hands and arms flying everywhere, the heart was strong, legs moving like crazy, just plain active. From what our naive and unexperienced eyes could tell, all looked good. Here are a couple of pictures she provided us with:

That's right, we are having a BOY!!!!! Bill was so excited, I knew he was doing a happy dance in his head. I was just happy the baby had a strong heart and all body parts. Until next time...

Dr.'s Appointment #2

So I had another Dr's appointment yesterday. This was number 2 of many to come at the Ob/Gyn. I went in not knowing what they do at these follow up visits. They weighed me (I have only gained 2 lbs), took my blood pressure, asked me how I was doing and if I had any questions, measured my uterus (just over 12 weeks), then proceeded to listen to the baby's heartbeat. Now I was seeing the Dr's nurse and she was all excited that we were going to hear the baby's heartbeat for the first time. We had to burst her bubble and let her know we had heard it twice already. Anyway she was using their little handheld device to find the heartbeat. After tracing over my stomach for a few minutes and mistaking my heartbeat for the baby's once, she came to the conclusion that she couldn't find it. Panic was beginning to start. The nurse then decided to squeeze me in for an ultrasound to see if we could find it that way. There wasn't an ultrasound tech available so another RN volunteered to do it. As she began to do the ultrasound, she could find my uterus, but could not find a baby. Panic was really beginning to sink in. I was freaking out that we had lost the baby, but she was finally able to find it and get a good view to see it's heart beating. We couldn't hear it because she didn't know how to turn that feature on. We were able to see it wave its arms around and see its fingers. At one point it looked like it was sucking on its hand. The ultrasound tech finally slipped into the room and got us a good heartbeat; 162 bpm, right where it is supposed to be. That was not a good visit, I freaked out one too many times. I hope the next one goes better. Until next time...

Update

So I went to the MFM (Maternal Fetal Medicine) specialist yesterday. I thought I was going to have my cervix messured, but didn't. I was informed they really can't tell the difference between the cervix and uterus until around the 18th week. Now I am not sure if I go back at that time or not, they really weren't clear. I did get another ultrasound done though. According to the MFM doctor, what my Ob thought was a gestational sac, was not. He said it was just fluid in my uterus. He said it was most likely my uterus lining being sluffed off, like when preparing to get pregnant or have a period. Good news, it was not a miscarriage. Good/bad news, it is not another baby. Another thing I found out, you can have kidney problems when you have a bicornuate uterus. I did not know this. Now I'm not sure if it is something that develops during fetal growth or comes on with age. So we looked at my kidneys as well. They looked good and in working order. Overall, it was not a very productive visit, but I did get another ultrasound and got to see my baby wave at me. Well wave with what little of a hand it has. This picture is zoomed in, the fetus is not that big yet.

FYI- The baby's head is on the left with the body to the right. The little white (detached looking) spot kinda in the middle of the "kidney bean" (baby), is its hand. If you look close, you can see the beginning of the fingers.

Until next time...

We are........PREGNANT!!!!!

It took Bill and I about 9-10 months to get pregnant, but it finally happened. I did a pregnancy test on Monday April 26, 2010 and it came back positive. I had been feeling really tired and irritable (insert "what's different" here), plus had not had my period. Long story short, I decided to do a pregnancy test just to make sure. Well it was positive. The next step was to figure out how to tell Bill and this is how I did it:

I got 2 onesies, put the positive pregnancy test on top and then wrapped it all in pink and white tissue paper with a blue and green ribbon. When Bill opened it, at first he wasn't sure if I was saying what he thought I was saying, but of course I was. I just wish I had gotten a picture of his face.

Next was to tell the family. On the day of our sealing Bill and I decided to tell our moms first, as an early Mother's Day present. We had gotten some pink and blue M&M's that said "Boy or Girl", "Girl or Boy". They too were not sure we were saying what they thought we were saying, but once again they were right.

Now I am going to humiliate myself and put monthly pictures up of the belly growth. So here is the first one, 8 weeks:
There is a little bit of a belly and I must confess, not all of it is pregnancy.

Okay now to the present day. I had my first appointment today, which means the first ultrasound. It was confirmed that I do have a bicornuate uterus and the baby is growing on one side of the uterus. They also saw a gestational sac on the other side of my uterus. This can mean 2 things: I either had an early miscarriage or I could be pregnant with twins who were conceived at different times! Now I go back in 2 weeks to have another ultrasound done to further determine what it could be. Either the sac will be reabsorbed, my body will pass the sac out or there will be another embryo growing. Only time will tell.

As for the baby that is growing, everything looks great and we are on track for a December 25th due date. That's right, Christmas day! The heart was beating good and its little nubbins are growing.

As you can see, there is a little body in there. If you look closely, you can also see the other side of my uterus in the picture on the bottom. It is the white tubular thing to the left of where the baby is. As I said before, there is a sac in that side, but it has yet to be determined at what stage it is at. I will keep you all up to date on the goings on of my pregnancy. Until next time...

Goin' to the Temple and we're goin' to get married!

On May 1st, Bill and I will be going to the Mount Timpanogos Temple to be sealed for all time and eternity. It has been a long road, but we are finally getting there. I am way excited to finally make those sacred covenants with my Heavenly Father. I am also very excited that it will occur in the Mount Timpanogos Temple. I have been in love with that temple since I walked through it during the open house back in 1996.

It will also be very nice to have family and friends there to support us in our decision. I know this is what my Heavenly Father wants us to do and we will be blessed because of it. Thank you to all who have been there for Bill and I as we make this next step in our marriage. We appreciate you all! Until next time...

Done Counting (on here)

Okay, the final 10 things I am grateful for.

1. A variety of food, I could not eat the same thing over and over again

2. Indoor plumbing, I would hate to have to use an outhouse all the time, YUCK!

3. Toilet paper, who wants to use leaves or your hand?

4. Scriptures, words to live by

5. Makeup, some days you just don't feel like being yourself

6. Candy, I love candy it makes me happy (unless I eat too much and then I get a tummy ache)

7. Fresh produce, nothing tastes better than fresh fruits and vegetables

8. Airplanes, sometimes you just don't want to drive 3 days to get to a destination

9. Telephones, they allow us to hear our loved ones voices

10. A home because it is more than a house

Until next time...

And Still Counting

I know, I know, I have been really bad. I get going and forget to post what I am grateful for. I am in bed and suddenly I remember. Bad excuse, I know. It's just like life when we forget to remember what we are grateful for and focus on everything else. So here goes, 20 things I am grateful (today and yesterday combined).

1. Flat Irons, they help tame my straight yet wavy hair

2. Sleep, it is a wonderful thing

3. Priesthood blessings, they calm the nerves and the soul

4. Music, it takes you to a whole other world

5. Cushioned chairs, my rear end really appreciates them

6. Payday, who doesn't like getting money, even if you did have to work for it

7. Lazy Sunday afternoons when I can just spend time relaxing with Bill and the dogs

8. Family, they are supportive and there when you need them

9. Blankets, they keep me cozy warm

10. Free lunches, who doesn't like a free meal

11. Blinds, some days you just want to shut the world out

12. Hard workers, without them, nothing would get done

13. Recipes, I am not creative enough to come up with things on my own

14. Pillows, they are nice to rest your head on and snuggle with

15. Soccer, sometimes you just need to kick something

16. Carpet, it makes walking around barefoot a little more comfortable

17. Gum, if you have ever smelled someones bad breath, you know why

18. Air fresheners, they make some rooms a little more pleasant

19. Scissors, imagine if we had to tear everything

20. Electric windows, I hated having to roll my car windows up and down (I know, I'm lazy)

Until next time...

And Counting

Okay so I was really bad and did not post the 10 things I was grateful for yesterday. I will make up for it today and post 20 things I am grateful for.

1. Rakes, it makes it so much easier to clean up leaves

2. Shovels, they help get those stubborn roots out

3. Fruit snacks, they are just yummy

4. Perennials, it is one less plant I have to plant the next year

5. Saturday mornings, I get to wake up naturally which usually means 8:30am or later

6. LDS.org, it is a great resource of church information

7. Time to play with my dogs, it is relaxing and they bring me so much joy

8. The first signs of Spring because I know the flowers will start blooming and summer is just around the corner

9. Washer and Dryer so I don't have to wash and dry my clothes by hand, if I did I'm sure they would all be dirty

10. Heating and Air Conditioning that keep me comfortable

11. Diet Dr. Pepper, its an "Unbelievably Satisfying" diet drink with 23 flavors

12. Snakes that keep the mice population down

13. Lotion, it makes my dry skin moist and soft

14. Deodorant, I would hope you would know why

15. Razors, now I hate to shave, but when I do I love the feeling of my legs

16. When Bill shaves, I love feeling his smooth cheek against mine

17. Trials in life, though they may be hard at the time, you usually come out a better and smarter person

18. Little kids, they remind us that life can be full of joy if you just remember to let yourself enjoy it

19. Clean water that I can drink and bathe in, not everyone in the world has the luxury

20. Belts, they help pants stay where they were meant to be, around your waist not your butt

Until next time...